1-800-GROWLER

The Real Growlerville 12: Problems With The Election

(A first hand account by investigative journalist, Mr. E)

 

I'm All Out Of Breath

Boy, am I out of shape. The jog from The Industrial Park couldn't have been more than a mile. I'm real interested in what Grandpa Huhu and the organization of EARS is going to do about those fake bugs! See my last post  on EARS.

I'm out of breath from jogging all the way into town. There is a long line waiting to get into the school. I am told that these are folks waiting to vote in the hotly contested race for the seat on the Huhu Authority.

An ambulance pulls up while I am questioning voters. This crowd is very unhappy about having to wait.

Ms. Babalyn Rymon told me, "Usually you're in and out of there, and there's never a line." I walk to the front, where there are three voting booths, each with evidence of the green powdery stuff, and the very first person to enter each has yet to emerge. They've been in there for just over an hour. The officials here have called the ambulance just in case.

From the overheard conversations with the voters in the booths and the paramedics, there is no medical emergency, just an inordinate amount of indecision. The situation, however unusual, becomes a boring wait after a while, so I move on toward the center of town.

 

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I spot Grandpa Huhu's motorcycle parked outside the EARS Building.

At first, the guard refuses to let me in, saying there is a closed meeting in progress. But after showing him my press card, and complaining that I am the one who provided the evidence, he makes a call, and Grandpa Huhu appears.

He takes me to a small conference room protected by student guards. Inside the hardcore leadership of this radical organization is engaged in a heated discussion about some recent environmental abuse.

 

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Remember the recent Camouflage disaster, when the ancient visibility consuming agent got out of control? It wasn't caused, like everyone assumed, by that accident during the taping of Mother Huhu's Magic Helpline. EARS operatives uncovered an internal memo proving that instead of carting their garbage to legal landfills, waste disposal giant Skimzo Corp treated tons of their refuse with active Camouflage, then dumped it in the nearby woods without re-containing the Camouflage.

This stupidity lead to a huge deficit in the city budget caused by the cleanup, and EARS wants to be sure that Skimzo contributes its due share of these expenses.

 

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Just as they begin discussing the fake cricket research project, the meeting is interrupted by an announcement from the Huhu Authority.

The election has been postponed to an unspecified date. But more than this, a crisis committee meeting has been called.

A General Emergency is in place.

This is serious stuff.

I'm trying to find out what's going on, but all phone lines are jammed, and no calls are getting through.

As I step outside, another rain shower is underway, and I can hear the explosions and see the strange fires of ATBE off in the distance. The Huhu Authority building is now guarded by security forces, and no one wants to talk to me.

next - Imposimazoo & ATBE Redux